I need some advise regarding family easter dinner with the in-laws.?

4 years ago my brother passed away and ever since my husband and I have been having all family dinners (easter,christmas ect) with his family and my parents. This year his sister wants to have it which is great. However my parents were not invited. So my husband called his sister to ask if they could come.When she returned his call the message on the machine said "Well the dinner was to introduce my boyfriends children and I did not have any intentions on inviting them....(long long pause) but I would hate for anyone to be alone on easter. I f they have no other family to go to then I guess it would be okay. I would have to get a card table and chairs and ask mom if she still had them.... (long pause) Well bye"





We both feel she does not want them to go and she knows they have no other family to go to.





I always grew up that you always invited extended family to come when they have no one else to go to!!





Do I have the right to be angry with her?





Help me!!!

I need some advise regarding family easter dinner with the in-laws.?
Forgive her for her ignorance,,,She wants the spotlight this year let her have it and when her brother does not show up to meet the rugrats because you are having your parents to your house for dinner and he is staying home, or he can go but he will be going alone,,,it will leave an impression on the selfish inlaw,,i mean the brats are going to be there more than just easter right,,she has no right to break tradition,,,,


Even make the effort to invite your inlaws only parents to your house in the middle of the day for dessert..
Reply:I dunno......it seems like an uncomfortable situation for everyone really, especially the new boyfriend.
Reply:That's just rude. I think that if she has an attitude, then maybe you and your husband should go to your parents for Easter.
Reply:I would be upset if I were in your place that is for sure. Sounds like your SIL has some growing up to do. Your husband really needs to talk her and let her know that she is being awfully rude to you and your parents considering they have been involved in this family easter dinner every year for a while now. She could have just been having a bad day too you know just stressing over planning the dinner. But, your husband really needs to stand up for you. Don't talk to her yourself about it, that may make things worse because from what I have learned SIL's can be very jealous of her brother's wife and that very well could be part of her rudeness. Please let your husband handle this one and make sure that he does. Because she is being rude and wrong and immature.


But, if push comes to shove don't attend her dinner and have dinner with your parents or plan to spend time with your parents in the morning or the night before. I think your SIL also could have picked a different weekend for introducing the boyfriend's kids.
Reply:Why don't you just have a nice intimate Easter dinner, for your family and your parents, I think they may be more comfortable, Have a blessed Easter!
Reply:She's basically telling you that her boyfriend, who is not related, is more important than your family. I can see how you could be insulted; but, if I were you, I'd choose not to be. Life is just too short. However, I'm not sure it's a good idea to take your parents there. Maybe you should have dinner with your parents instead, and tell his sister you'll visit with them later in the day. Try not to get your panties in a bunch about this, because it's really not worth a big family battle.
Reply:Go buy yourself a ham and get ready to cook dinner yourself. If she is going to be that rude then don't go and have your parents over for dinner. If she says anything about y'all being rude for not coming b/c she was going to introduce the bf's kids then remind her she too was rude. Your own actions always bite you in the rear!
Reply:I think your SIL should have chosen a weekend separate of a holiday to introduce her b/f's kids to the family.





Maybe fix a small dinner and invite your parents over.


I wouldn't attend the other dinner party.
Reply:of course you have the right to be miffed


she was using a poor choice of time to introduce the boyfriends children, a big event in any mixed family but dont do it at an established family gathering, the children will feel more like in comers than ever, however she thought this a good idea and clearly this took place above anyone elses feelings including the fact your parents are as much a part of this time as anyone else


selfish and thoughtless on her part


but she thinks what she is doing is a good idea and its clearly not, from the childrens point of view, yours or your parents, take your parents, make the most of it, DO NOT let her see you are miffed, and next year, you have your festivities, with YOUR family


good luck
Reply:cook dinner at your house,invite your parents,and anyone else you want.whoever comes,comes.ALL family should be together.she did this for a reason,the snake.


and your husband should stand by you on this as even tho it is his sister,once he married you,you are his family now.and you know,anger,has it's place,but not on easter.really i would not ever forget what she did and i would let her know how i feel about the whole thing and enuf said.take the upper hand on this situation since it's your family that was shunned.and don't back down on the attitude here after,and tell your husband that's how it will be to.but that you still love her but hey..............
Reply:they are called "Monster-in-laws" for a reason. Don't be upset because this might be a ONE TIME THING